Dear 12-year-old Elena,
There’s never been a goal you couldn’t meet as long as you worked hard enough. That’s what you thought, anyway.
I got a five by cramming 20 hours the weekend before the APUSH exam, earned all A’s by doing dozens of extra engineering practice problems, and spent four weeks writing, editing and designing newspaper pages to ensure every print edition was finished by its deadline.
But then, the worst thing imaginable happened: I failed.
It all started on Sept. 7, 2021, when you did the most impulsive thing you’ve ever done in your life: email Shaun Thompson about the cross-country team.
He replied six minutes later and explained the registration and practice details. “My room is 123 if you need to come by and ask any other questions,” he wrote.
I threw myself into the sport, dedicating hours daily to becoming the fastest I could be. I became obsessed. Instead of doing it for fun, I started running for seconds off my PR and a place on varsity. I’ve run about 30 miles a week every week for the past three years, and even ran Conference on a broken foot. But no matter how hard I tried, I’ve always been mediocre.
I wish I could tell you that I don’t take anything too seriously anymore, but that would be a lie. Although I didn’t meet all of my goals, I wouldn’t change anything about my running experience if given the chance. I still enjoyed brutal track workouts and base-run conversations about everything from my friend’s relationship issues to Freud’s sexist theories. I mastered the perfect meet-day hairstyle and made core memories roasting in the sun with my teammates.
I committed to a college I can’t run for. But as much as I’ll miss the team, I know my running days are not over. Laps around Riverside will turn into neighborhood loops in New Orleans’ garden district. For once, I will turn my attention to the beautifully diverse architecture instead of my mile splits. And long runs through the gorgeous Audubon park will remind me that there is value in simply doing something for enjoyment.
Even if you don’t graduate with a 4.0 GPA, run a sub-6 mile and ace every test, everything will work out. While it’s important to work hard, there is more to life than numbers, to-do lists and ten-step plans. Honestly, failing will be the best thing you ever do.
